5 Songs one should never take literally

If you think that 'munni, sheila and pauwa chadhake aayi chikni chameli' are rather cheap then you will have a 90s kid like me totally flabbergasted. And believe me I might even take offence because of your lack of Bollywood Insight. Of course munni is copied from another song "Launda, badnam ho GAI naseeban tere liye" but thats a story for another time. My point is that I dont agree to the grotesque description of these recent item numbers as I have stood the tide of times when Bollwood was shooting canon balls at the audience.

Bholywood or in other terms, the bhojpuri world has always been a fore funner in producing songs that can leave you gasping for sanity but trust me there is nothing more sane in this rather lackluster world.

There are just numerous examples in the holi world of Banaras, Ballia and Patna, but the below 2 songs just stand out

                                                                Hamra hau chahi - Mujhe wo chahiye? chhee Baba!!!

                                                            Balamwa chhakka maar gayal? Raat ke barah baje? 
                                  Never before in the history of mankind has cricket explained the beauty of love making so well

But since we are the developed world of Mumbai, we will strictly talk Bollywood here and without much ado I will list down my top 5 list of some of these double meaning songs.

5)Sarkaaye lo khatiya jada lage

Now this beauty of a song explain Mr. David Dhawan in 5 mins. Sarkaaye lo khatiya jaada lage", the title explains it all, since the weather outside is cold and hence the cots should be moved closer to each other. Period. Or is it? Everytime Karishma Kapoor lifted her red lungi, the literal meaning stopped making sense. The Majda cinema hall in Banaras has never gone so berserk as it did then and I think it never will. Dhawan saab also repeated the fate in his movie Eena Meena Deeka with the song "Saiyan ke sath rajaiya me, bada maja aawe madaiya me". Hats off to simplicity

4) Khada hai Khada hai

David Dhawan was always the man with the audacity and in this beauty of a malfunction, with a little help from Anil Kapoor and Juhi ji (Juhi ji nahi, bas juhi. Ailla), underlines the erections incurred. I mean its as obvious as it gets but then the lyrics change to - 'Khada hai, khada hai, khada hai. Sir pe tere ashiq khada hai'. I wonder what is being referred to as 'ashiq' here. 

3) Teri le loon

The coming together of Mahendra Kapoor and Dada Kondke is bound to produce a piece of art, no matter how misfired the shot may be. And this song from the movie 'tere mere beech me' is as direct as there is. Teri le loon (baahein baahon me), seriously? Thats what I am supposed to takeaway? Reminds me of the song "ek rupaiye me do kilo". Am I not supposed to believe that they are saying "ek rupaiye me do ki lo"? Wassup Batman?

2) Maal Gaadi tu dhakka laga

David ji, aap to bas sir bade wo ho. aapko pata hai ki sabko kya chahiye. Making the list again from David Dhawan is a beauty again from Andaz. The movie was a gem and no wonder the other song which it featured goes like "Le lo, le lo (mera imtihan)". The song is about a suhagraat when unlike other Bollywood movies, couples are actually up to making love but again the expression has to be multi-layered (where are you Alan Moore?). So the song goes like - "Le Maalgaadi tu dhakka laga" and Anil Kapoor does try to push with a thrust saying "tu maalgadi, driver mai tera". How romantic. Hailaa Juhi Chawla!!!!!!!!!

1) Choli ke pechhe kya hai?

I know a lot of you would have been amazed by the previous songs, but sincerely, there were no prizes for guessing the top spot. Salute to puberty!! For all of us born in early to mid 80s, this was perhaps the first time we had an erection (no disrespect to Milind Soman and Madhu sapre). I mean this is a cult classic, it started an era of Pelvic thrusts by the bollywood beauties. Madhuri ji is also credited with the bombastic act of "dhak dhak karne laga", but this was different. This was raw, in your face. Dont ask me what Nina Gupta is doing here but believe me, cinema halls were in raptures after the song. It was such a nuke that immediately Varsha Usgaonkar was doing "Aanchal ke andar kya hai" in Khalnayika. Waise aaj bhi mann me bas ek hi sawal hai - Choli ke peechhe kya hai (and have I made it large?)


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