4 Movies Aamir Khan Wouldn't Want You To Watch

We all know of Aamir Khan as India's present King of TV as well as for being Mister Perfectionist, who chooses his films more selectively than our Government chooses our President. However, being human, he too has made his share of So-Bad films that we as kids in the early 90s were subject to. Looking back, even Aamir wouldn't want to watch these films again

4. Daulat Ki Jung


It could easily be a Photo-Shopped poster of Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak
A few years before this atrocity on celluloid was made there was a film affectionately called QSQT, where a young Aamir Khan and Juhi Chawla played lovers whose families oppose their match. In a stroke of genius, a gentleman named Jalil Ahmad decided to produce another movie with the same premise

They didn't even bother to change much of the dialogue
And because the writer of the film thought that he needed to up-the-level from a College Romance, he added a twist (not) worthy of Indy Jones in the film.

You see, the main trait of Aamir Khan's character in the film is that he has a photographic memory, and in a totally random event of escaping crooks (while running from the wrath of their families) the couple come across a treasure map, no less. And Aamir Khan memorizes it before eating it up.

What follows is a typical early 90s mad-cap adventure involving cannibals and gangsters which gets resolved by several strokes of good luck.

Looking back, this actually was a pretty awesome film.

3. Awwal Number


For no fault of mine, I loved this film. It had CRICKET! A match in which Australia lost, and a passing reference to Sunny Gavaskar too. Released almost a decade before Lagaan, it was a film produced, directed, acted and watched by a sadly over the hill Dev sa'ab


It also had Aditya Pancholi playing his rightful role as a villain, a heroine who tried VERY hard to be sexy

The word Gratuitous comes to mind, but after all this is a Dev Anand Film
and a song that lingers better than the movie has ever hope of doing


But nothing could prevent this movie from sucking. The main plot was about how a righteous inspector (who in real life was well past retirement age) prevents a group of Terrorists from blasting a bomb planted in the middle of a cricket pitch, along with an angle of betting on cricket and an errant ex-cricketer turned Bad-guy (like Vinod Kambli). Aamir Khan featured in a weird romantic lead as a cricketer whose mantra of success involved listening to the heroine's awful voice on a walk-man.

I have tried very hard to find something right with this film, and only the song above comes to mind.

2. Mela


This might also be the last commercially unsuccessful movie that Aamir Khan starred in, and it sucked so bad that even the generous cleavage display by Twinkle Khanna couldn't save it (although Mrs Akki's cleavage hasn't really had any hit films ever)

Also it starred 'The Loser Brother'
Many said that Aamir Khan made this movie with the purpose of paying tribute to the old classic 'Caravan' starring Jeetendra, and also with the hope of making some sort of a film career for his brother Faisal (not to be confused with the cartoonist), but the directionless story and bad acting, aided with the fact that the movie was released at the turn of the century (which necessitated an unnecessary reference to the year 2000) all worked together to screw anyone (like me) who dared to watch this film, lured by the promise of Aamir Khan's acting, who played perhaps the worst role of his career


.

1. Aatank Hi Aatank


To the new internet generation fans of Rajinikanth, the only time they would have seen Rajini and Ghajini together would have been this

Pictured : A Moustache Twirling Competition
But, Aamir Khan and Rajinikanth have shared screen-space before, in a movie we had talked of tangentially here, it was a film that had Rajinikanth as Sonny Corleone and Aamir as Michael 'Al Pacino' Corleone. Seriously, with such an epic premise, what could go wrong?

Actually, Everything
Attempts to remake the Godfather in India haven't always been Sarkar-esque, and this movie leads as a prime example of how a nearly Frame By Frame copy of a masterpiece does not necessarily result in something even half as good

The Hairstyle doesn't help either
There are people who believe that the world deserves a fare share of Aatank (hi Aatank), and one of them has been generous enough to upload the whole movie on Youtube. Watch it, I dare you.

For all the detractors of Aamir Khan and his Satyamev Jayate initiative, don't probe into his personal life to find things to attack him with, just mention any one of these films to him, and watch him wilt.

PS : Honourable Mention - Mann, a horrible film which was too mediocre to even make it to this list.

7 comments:

{ ankit } at: June 19, 2012 at 1:46 PM said...

Awwal Number aur Mela to thik thak muvis hain. Matlab itni buri to nahi hai ki u will ask why aamir aamir why :)

{ spectator } at: June 19, 2012 at 10:12 PM said...

I remember enjoying Daulat ki Jung as a kid.

{ Rustum } at: June 19, 2012 at 11:15 PM said...

How you could miss Aamir's epic failure - Raakh

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raakh

{ Raj } at: June 20, 2012 at 10:43 AM said...

amir ki baki galtiyan thik hai mafi layak par mann ek bure sapne se bhi bhayankar hai!

{ Nitesh.B.Rai } at: June 28, 2012 at 1:21 PM said...

how could you miss isssi ka naam zindagi with aamir,farha and shakti kapoor.complete wash out and bombed at the box office

{ Weirdo } at: July 4, 2012 at 10:50 PM said...

what about Bazi, Mangal Panday, love love love, tum mere ho, deewana mujh sa nahi, jawani zindabad, afsana pyar ka, parampara ?

{ Yash } at: August 2, 2012 at 10:41 PM said...

@Jitendra - Bazi was decent man. And Afsana pyar ka and all while being shitty movies in the current scenario, are a product of their times and cannot be entirely judged on current sensitivities . Even QSQT falls under the same banner then, and the only reason you wouldn't call it bad is because it was a box office hit.

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