Bollywood On-Screen Blunders

An official declaration that this is talking about goof-ups/bloopers/mistakes in some very popular and appreciated Bollywood movies. Though I am mentioning just a very few here, there of course are hundreds of such mistakes in our movies and I am sure most of you have some of your own observations to add to this list. But nevertheless, since I am writing this, and not you, I will talk of the ones I found most interesting and unnoticed.

Ok, so we start with some very subtle ones. The first one that comes to me is Karan Johar's 2001 (keep a note of this) blockbuster Kabhi khushi Kabhi Ghum. While the internet has much to talk of the mistakes in the movie, I picked some of the most interesting (read annoying sometimes) ones - Amitabh is shown using a Nokia Communicator device which was launched in 1996-1998 and Amitabh was using it in the movie's ten-years-ago era which becomes 1991 assuming the present time of the movie to be 2001. It is like saying my dad gifted me an android phone on my first birthday. Then an even more unnoticable one, because of its appearance during a starry party (which, by the way had son and father dancing with scarcely dressed ladies in front of the mother and 3 species of grandmothers, what a pity), is Amitabh singing 'Aati Kya Khandala', again in the 1991 time frame whereas Ghulam, was itself a 1997 movie. By the time Rani mukherji asks SRK (again in the 1991 era) why he wasn't replying to her e-mails and SRK drives the fat child Hrithik (who looses enough to become a hunk and grows an extra finger with age) in a Range Rover (yes yes, again in 1991), you know Karan Johar really sucked at managing flashback.

A similar anachronism was left unnoticed in the recent blockuster '3 Idiots' (yeah well, Amir Khan isn't that much of a perfectionist then). While Raju Rastogi (Sharman Joshi) is in coma state - that age old Bollywood patented coma (remember Har Dil Jo Pyar Karega) where you are just muted and paused but you can see, hear and understand every fucking thing around you; at the hospital, Amir uses an Airtel Data Card to make Raju see his friend Farhan Querashi. You got it then, didn't you? 3 Idiots was a 2009 movie and those college-time events were supposed to be 10 years back (remember Chatur making 10 year long challenge?) when Airtel did not sell Data Cards. No wait, fuck, Airtel did not exist before 2005! Again in the same movie, Kareena shows Amir (pause here and read the last 3 words again) how to deliver a baby using YouTube which came into existence somewhere in 2005 whereas the scene was again part of the 10 year old flashback. May be ICE was an incredibly awesome-kick-ass college where people had invented Youtube and Data cards long before Amir made the Virus Inverter and suicidal Lobo made the camera-cum-helicopter (or whatever it was).

Now, the above two were not noticed because of big names and stars. Here is a one most of us wouldn't have noticed not because of stars (and there were stars involved indeed) but because we all would have wanted the movie to end sooner. This is about Made in India Superhero Krrish where Rohit (Senior Hrithink Roshan) is busy in Singapore (or anywhere outside India for that matter) making Future Machine for 2 years and his mom (maintain hai!!) calls him to inform his wife is pregnant while he had been away for 2 years. I guess Krrish wasn't the superhero then, the sperm that traveled from Singapore to India on its own and then made it to the exact destination (read fallopian tube in biological terms), was the real unsung superhero. Annu Kapoor from Vicky Donor would kill to recruit Rohit for such a supernatural sperm sample (and the movie will be called Jaadoo Donor then).

Big B again comes to the party with a mistake in the movie Baghban (and I hate this movie because my mom starts with - this is what really happens in life). Amitabh and Hema get separated for 6 months just after Holi (what kind of asshole children they produced, and all 4 of them, real consistency) and within those six months between March (Holi) and September, they celebrate both Karva Chauth (comes in October, but fine, we can modify Indian festivals' dates for Big B) and to your awe, Valentine's Day as well.

WTF mom!!

Another Shah Rukh Khan blockbuster Kuchh Kuchh Hota Hai and you know what, all these SRK league movie makers Karan Johar and Yash Chopra and lot seem to be really good at making the public eat all kind of illogical shit through their movies. Rani Mukherji dies (I wanted her to as well, I was too senti on the SRK-Kajol pair at that age) leaving 8 letters to her daughter Anjali (what an uncommon name in Bollywood), one for each of her birthday. Can you imagine what she would have written for a 1,2,3 year old girl and what would the girl have read off those?

Ok so now we move back in time a little. Talking of the greatest blockbuster Sholay (no no, this is not about poor Ramlal and all the filthy things he needed to do for the hathkate thakur), the village at Ramgarh had no electricity, and we can see that when Jaya moves around the house putting the oil lamps off with Amitabh playing the mouth organ and watching her (and they were recently married, in fact, Sholay's shooting got delayed due to Jaya's pregnancy).

Now why would a no-power-supply village have a water tank (so high) on which Dharam Ji can perform his antiques - both while proposing Basanti and while threatening Kalia and the other two insignificant men (poor chaps, I am not sure how much they got paid for their roles)? I mean how did they get water up to that tank without electricity?



Here is a very technical one and again an upset to the "Amir-Khan-is-a-perfectionist" religion. This is about balls - no I am not saying Amir is coward or something similar. In the movie Lagaan, the time frame shown was 1892 and they bowled 6-balls-an-over which came into existence in the mid nineties only. According to Wikipedia, between 1889 and 1899, the English played cricket with a 5-ball over. Bhuvan really had balls to stand up against Captain Russel, in fact one extra per over !

And to the pleasure of all of us, my list today ends with again the one and only SRK. It is only fitting since we started with his movie and it is impossible to keep him out of any discussion about the good, bad and ugly (emphasis on the latter two) of Bollywood. So anyway, this one is from the recent mindlessly created disappointment called Ra-One (and I was already disappointed at Random Access One naming) where Papa Shah Rukh Khan (who incredibly pronounces Keys as Kiss and eats noodles with curd, Tamils should ban him from Tamil Nadu I'd say) is shown as a Tamil Brahmin guy but is buried with a coffin and all the black-and-white dressed people and the well sung backdrop song and beautifully made rain-burial scene. The next scene, Kareena releases SRK's ashes in the river. So, just for the fantasy of a Watchmen's Comedian's rainy burial scene shot in black and white for the effect of it, the director buried a Tam-Bram and then, for the sake of the Indian ritual, somehow found his ashes as well to flow in the river. Fine, SRK is a superstar, but does it really justify killing the man twice, once for burial and once for his ashes. There's more in the movie, the malicious Ra-One software takes over that hindi-speaking jackie-chan's body and then he is shown living with the grandmother of the dead guy enjoying some random samurai noodle soup. What the fuck! Didn't Ra-One come out from software to hardware just to find and kill Lucifer? Or may be that soup was supposed to help with his objective.

Now if there are mistakes you found in movies Aashiqui.in, Bittoo Boss or Love, Break-ups, Zindagi and others in that league (read insignificant), then you really got courage to have watched those. Anyway, this is all for now, may Bollywood keeps giving us more and more to talk about on Filmistani. Rock karo sab log !

P S : jinhe aur bhi movies ki aur bhi galatiyan bataane ki chull mach rahi hai, add comments if you may.